We
all need hugging and cuddling no matter what age we are. We also need
the touch of a smile, verbal affection and eye contact too and we need key
relationships with people we can trust. http://www.nurseryworld.co.uk/news/1067702/Hugs-extend-happiness-Happy-Days/
Affective interaction is necessary for the healthy, cognitive, social and emotional development of every human being.
This is as necessary as food.
There is so much research that exists on this subject, Harlow’s famous experiments with monkey’s in the 1960’s showed the need for comfort and warmth and many studies with infants in orphanages and in hospitals showed conclusive results that if babies do not have contact with a significant other and are not touched they fail to thrive.
Infants deprived of skin contact lose weight, become ill and even die.
Premature babies receiving “touch therapy" gained weight faster, cried less and show more signs of a relaxed pulse respiration rate and muscle tension and I'm sure that there must be research with the elderly too, but I haven’t explored this.
It seems that this natural warm physical response to another human being causes a biochemical release of the hormone, oxytocin and when this hormone enters the bloodstream we feel good: it lowers the levels of stress hormones in the body, reducing blood pressure, improves mood, increases tolerance for pain and maybe even helping the body to heal more quickly.
Cuddling/hugging is so very good for us it lowers stress
Touch is also the way that many of our memories are stored which means that our early memories are anchored deeply into the physiology of the bodies neurology (touch permeates through the dermis (skin) and activates tiny receptors which are distributed throughout the entire body). These early memories, including the way that we were touched create a pattern, a template from which subsequent relationships are formed, consequently, it is crucial to recognise the importance of the essential value of reassuring and caring touch, hugging, cuddling and expressions of affection…relationships and attachment.
This is what Leboyer 1975;Wilson
"It is through the skin, through touch, that the newborn first learns about its world and draws conclusions about whether it is a safe place or a hostile one"
When we feel contained in the arms of another we learn to trust. When we feel safe and securely attached, we develop the confidence to explore our surroundings independently, with a sense of adventure and self assuredness, knowing that we can return to that place of safety when we need it.
It gives us a sense of safety and security and supports the development of trust
This is what I understand about the importance of cuddling (and its connections with attachment and developing a healthy sense of mental and emotional wellbeing) so when I read a title like “cuddling children – not allowed again, which was posted on a linked-in group recently, it calls me to engage, share and respond to this very important topic and my desire is now to share what was discussed with all of you too.
Janet Uwins - Independent Early Years Consultant and Tutor,Chelmsford UK
“I have been teaching a regular class of pre-school practitioners today who are nearing the end of their L3 Diploma. In classroom debate, one of my students raised the subject of cuddling children, a subject that was quite controversial a few years ago. It seems to have reared its ugly head once again, this fine line between acceptable and not acceptable practice with young children, and once again I am hearing messages that settings are asking staff not to touch the children in order to protect themselves against safeguarding accusations.
Have I missed something here?
I was under the impression we had moved on from blanket policies of this nature and were putting the needs of the child first. Surely the concept behind our Key Person approach and acknowledgement of attachment theory and the emotional well-being of the child is fundamental. I would like to hear from any of you (practitioners in particular) who can offer me any enlightenment as to this supposed U-turn.”
When Janet says it has reared its “ugly head” I agree with her “the ugliness” is that child abuse exists, children could be harmed or a member of staff falsely accused of abuse and the level of fear paired with a need for safety sometimes results in staff in nurseries, teachers in schools, social workers and many others who work with children, being confused and cautious about cuddling and showing their care and affection freely…
There were many responses illustrating this concern on-line, including one contributor saying that she had worked in one placement where minimum contact was suggested (in the 12 to 18 month room) and that blanket policies about this seem to be apparent in larger chains.
Here are a few other responses for you to read:
Elaine Hook, Manager Sole Charge at Monkey Puzzle Day Nurseries,Hemel
Hempstead
“We cuddle children openly in a room with other members of staff keeping our hand visible and usually rely on the child's lead. Of course for emotional, attachment and attunement reasons practitioners have to cuddle babies and small children but always under the organisation policies and procedures and with someone else in the room. We never do anything alone or behind closed doors especially with older children. We also ensure that we write an incident procedure form over absolutely anything and have it witnessed by a staff member and signed off by the deputy or manager and then ask the parents to sign the form and also give them a copy. It is more detrimental to the development and well being of a small child (as we all know) to not cuddle or comfort a child than it to comfort. I believe all practitioners especially managers/owners should be confident (and know their own policies well) to challenge ideas like these in the best interest of the child and their learning and development. We all want children to grow up as social well adjusted individuals and as well all know if children are not stroked, cuddled or love that can cause a wide range of trauma for later in life”.
Kathy Brodie who provides tailored training and support for early years nurseries and professionals,Stockport UK
4.5……….I recommend that the safeguarding and welfare requirements are made more explicit about warning signs in the behaviour of adults working in a setting. I also recommend that the EYFS sets out clearly the high level content of the child protection training that lead safeguarding practitioners are required to attend. This should align with the Working together to safeguard children guidance, and include content on safeguarding within early years settings.
4.6 That said, I recognise that this must be balanced against the need to ensure that those working in settings do not become afraid to interact confidently with the children in their care. It is only right, for example, that young children should be hugged and comforted when this is needed – indeed withholding this type of comfort could be damaging to a child. This is why this type of training and knowledge is essential to help practitioners understand what is, and is not, appropriate
Catherine, Proprietor and Centre Manager at Springlands Training and Assessment Centre, Principal and Proprietor at SPRINGLANDS (early years, childcare),Principal and Owner at St Mary's Kindergarten and The Cherries Nursery:
“Why do we put children in the position where they have to ASK for comfort (i.e. take the child's lead as they become upset/ask) surely, as sensitive adults who understand children we should anticipate when a child may become frightened or upset and step in with a 'hands on' approach (as appropriate) before they get upset?
I believe, the more 'TLC' they receive the more secure and capable of handling traumatic situations and healthily.
How many fewer than fives currently are anticipated to have mental health problems when they are adults? There is a statistic!
What's the point? Emotional security is more important than anything else?
In my opinion, the best practitioners will 'naturally' respond and personally I think they should remember, as adults we are unlikely to have any REAL memories of our lives before six (maybe just those told to us) - I am sure you will agree what we do remember of our childhoods has influenced us somehow in adulthood - but as we remember consciously we can rationalise it and maybe repair the hurt. I worry about what is not remembered and this is why 'early years' is such a huge responsibility!
I personally think no cuddling is neglect - that maybe is my subconscious influencing that judgment, particularly when I look at my first school photo!
The nursery systems, environment, staffing ratio's, policies together with the professionalism and trust of individuals within teams should be in place to support individual staff in giving to children; to meet all their needs - this obviously requires 'constant review' and 'risk assessment' to possible accusations/worries/claims.
This is such an important discussion. I enjoyed it and at the same time I feel a real sadness too…This is an area, close to my heart, one that I address with in my work around human connection and relationships and interactions …
So I say lets talk about love and affection in our trainings with those working with our children, in their homes, in nurseries and in schools and lets invite discussions and the opportunity for people to share their beliefs and attitudes and to explore their fears and concerns in this area.
We all need hugging and cuddling no matter what age we are
Are you willing to share your thoughts on this one?
Affective interaction is necessary for the healthy, cognitive, social and emotional development of every human being.
This is as necessary as food.
There is so much research that exists on this subject, Harlow’s famous experiments with monkey’s in the 1960’s showed the need for comfort and warmth and many studies with infants in orphanages and in hospitals showed conclusive results that if babies do not have contact with a significant other and are not touched they fail to thrive.
Infants deprived of skin contact lose weight, become ill and even die.
Premature babies receiving “touch therapy" gained weight faster, cried less and show more signs of a relaxed pulse respiration rate and muscle tension and I'm sure that there must be research with the elderly too, but I haven’t explored this.
It seems that this natural warm physical response to another human being causes a biochemical release of the hormone, oxytocin and when this hormone enters the bloodstream we feel good: it lowers the levels of stress hormones in the body, reducing blood pressure, improves mood, increases tolerance for pain and maybe even helping the body to heal more quickly.
Cuddling/hugging is so very good for us it lowers stress
Touch is also the way that many of our memories are stored which means that our early memories are anchored deeply into the physiology of the bodies neurology (touch permeates through the dermis (skin) and activates tiny receptors which are distributed throughout the entire body). These early memories, including the way that we were touched create a pattern, a template from which subsequent relationships are formed, consequently, it is crucial to recognise the importance of the essential value of reassuring and caring touch, hugging, cuddling and expressions of affection…relationships and attachment.
This is what Leboyer 1975;
"It is through the skin, through touch, that the newborn first learns about its world and draws conclusions about whether it is a safe place or a hostile one"
When we feel contained in the arms of another we learn to trust. When we feel safe and securely attached, we develop the confidence to explore our surroundings independently, with a sense of adventure and self assuredness, knowing that we can return to that place of safety when we need it.
It gives us a sense of safety and security and supports the development of trust
This is what I understand about the importance of cuddling (and its connections with attachment and developing a healthy sense of mental and emotional wellbeing) so when I read a title like “cuddling children – not allowed again, which was posted on a linked-in group recently, it calls me to engage, share and respond to this very important topic and my desire is now to share what was discussed with all of you too.
Janet Uwins - Independent Early Years Consultant and Tutor,
“I have been teaching a regular class of pre-school practitioners today who are nearing the end of their L3 Diploma. In classroom debate, one of my students raised the subject of cuddling children, a subject that was quite controversial a few years ago. It seems to have reared its ugly head once again, this fine line between acceptable and not acceptable practice with young children, and once again I am hearing messages that settings are asking staff not to touch the children in order to protect themselves against safeguarding accusations.
Have I missed something here?
I was under the impression we had moved on from blanket policies of this nature and were putting the needs of the child first. Surely the concept behind our Key Person approach and acknowledgement of attachment theory and the emotional well-being of the child is fundamental. I would like to hear from any of you (practitioners in particular) who can offer me any enlightenment as to this supposed U-turn.”
When Janet says it has reared its “ugly head” I agree with her “the ugliness” is that child abuse exists, children could be harmed or a member of staff falsely accused of abuse and the level of fear paired with a need for safety sometimes results in staff in nurseries, teachers in schools, social workers and many others who work with children, being confused and cautious about cuddling and showing their care and affection freely…
There were many responses illustrating this concern on-line, including one contributor saying that she had worked in one placement where minimum contact was suggested (in the 12 to 18 month room) and that blanket policies about this seem to be apparent in larger chains.
Here are a few other responses for you to read:
Elaine Hook, Manager Sole Charge at Monkey Puzzle Day Nurseries,
“We cuddle children openly in a room with other members of staff keeping our hand visible and usually rely on the child's lead. Of course for emotional, attachment and attunement reasons practitioners have to cuddle babies and small children but always under the organisation policies and procedures and with someone else in the room. We never do anything alone or behind closed doors especially with older children. We also ensure that we write an incident procedure form over absolutely anything and have it witnessed by a staff member and signed off by the deputy or manager and then ask the parents to sign the form and also give them a copy. It is more detrimental to the development and well being of a small child (as we all know) to not cuddle or comfort a child than it to comfort. I believe all practitioners especially managers/owners should be confident (and know their own policies well) to challenge ideas like these in the best interest of the child and their learning and development. We all want children to grow up as social well adjusted individuals and as well all know if children are not stroked, cuddled or love that can cause a wide range of trauma for later in life”.
Kathy Brodie who provides tailored training and support for early years nurseries and professionals,
4.5……….I recommend that the safeguarding and welfare requirements are made more explicit about warning signs in the behaviour of adults working in a setting. I also recommend that the EYFS sets out clearly the high level content of the child protection training that lead safeguarding practitioners are required to attend. This should align with the Working together to safeguard children guidance, and include content on safeguarding within early years settings.
4.6 That said, I recognise that this must be balanced against the need to ensure that those working in settings do not become afraid to interact confidently with the children in their care. It is only right, for example, that young children should be hugged and comforted when this is needed – indeed withholding this type of comfort could be damaging to a child. This is why this type of training and knowledge is essential to help practitioners understand what is, and is not, appropriate
Catherine, Proprietor and Centre Manager at Springlands Training and Assessment Centre, Principal and Proprietor at SPRINGLANDS (early years, childcare),Principal and Owner at St Mary's Kindergarten and The Cherries Nursery:
“Why do we put children in the position where they have to ASK for comfort (i.e. take the child's lead as they become upset/ask) surely, as sensitive adults who understand children we should anticipate when a child may become frightened or upset and step in with a 'hands on' approach (as appropriate) before they get upset?
I believe, the more 'TLC' they receive the more secure and capable of handling traumatic situations and healthily.
How many fewer than fives currently are anticipated to have mental health problems when they are adults? There is a statistic!
What's the point? Emotional security is more important than anything else?
In my opinion, the best practitioners will 'naturally' respond and personally I think they should remember, as adults we are unlikely to have any REAL memories of our lives before six (maybe just those told to us) - I am sure you will agree what we do remember of our childhoods has influenced us somehow in adulthood - but as we remember consciously we can rationalise it and maybe repair the hurt. I worry about what is not remembered and this is why 'early years' is such a huge responsibility!
I personally think no cuddling is neglect - that maybe is my subconscious influencing that judgment, particularly when I look at my first school photo!
The nursery systems, environment, staffing ratio's, policies together with the professionalism and trust of individuals within teams should be in place to support individual staff in giving to children; to meet all their needs - this obviously requires 'constant review' and 'risk assessment' to possible accusations/worries/claims.
This is such an important discussion. I enjoyed it and at the same time I feel a real sadness too…This is an area, close to my heart, one that I address with in my work around human connection and relationships and interactions …
So I say lets talk about love and affection in our trainings with those working with our children, in their homes, in nurseries and in schools and lets invite discussions and the opportunity for people to share their beliefs and attitudes and to explore their fears and concerns in this area.
We all need hugging and cuddling no matter what age we are
Are you willing to share your thoughts on this one?
